Can somebody please tell me where the hell the past five years have gone?

My godson – Emmitt Schroeder, my pride and joy and my little energetic beam of sunshine – turned five years old last Thursday and I'm sitting here trying to figure out where the time went.

These days, he spends his time running around the house like a maniac and watching YouTube; a spitting image of his father, John, who is my best friend. We both knew that when little Emmitt came into the world that our lives (more his than mine) were about to be changed forever.

The first thought that came to my mind was the diaper changing process and how I was a little nervous since I've never cleaned or wiped another human before.

This special, yet somewhat gross moment, is still engraved in my mind five years later. Emmitt was a very squiggly kid, making the diaper change a challenge at first. I hoped to have a nice and easy cleanup, but I was instead gifted with a very messy diaper that was full to the brim.

First, the smell hit, then came the dry heaves.

Obviously, this is completely normal and I'm sure it gets easier over time, but for me, it was one and done – for now at least. Luckily, Emmitt is a big boy now and has grown out of his diapers, so my one-time duty of changing his diaper as his godfather was fulfilled and is now a memory I'll never forget.

Got a funny first-time diaper-changing story? Shoot me an email with your story to or shoot Michael and Maddie a message on the Fun 107 app.

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