An Open Letter to the Fall River Catfish
For many years, a Fall River man has been "catfishing" women of the SouthCoast, and it's time to put an end to it.
To Whom It May Concern (and you know who you are):
My name is Gazelle and I am full aware of your sleazy ways to trick innocent women into sending you private photos. To save you any further embarrassment, I will not mention your name, even though I know who you are.
This letter is directed not only to you, but to others out there who think it's completely fine to womanize. Not once, not twice, but THREE times I have called you out, kindly asking that you cease your trickery and leave the women of this area—and everywhere else—alone. In case you forgot, here's what I wrote:
Honestly, when will it end? Anonymous sources (their names will not be mentioned to protect their identity) have personally told me that you have literally been doing this since high school. You're a grown man living in a cyber world of impersonation, constantly hiding behind your keyboard, afraid to man up to the reality of your wrong-doings.
I'd like to now take this time, in hopes that you're currently reading this, to enlighten you on how to be a gentlemen:
- Be yourself. There's no need to pretend that you're someone else to find a significant other. There are plenty of people in this world, and as long as you are true to yourself instead of stealing other people's photos and pretending that they are you, then you'll eventually find the person of your dreams.
- Politely ask for a proper date. Don't stalk. Not only is this wrong, it's illegal and if you're persistent with it, you'll one day end up in jail. Just ask someone to grab a bite to eat or a drink. Chivalry is important; there's no need to get weird and linger about. The worst that will happen is a simple no, thank you. That's when you move on and leave that person alone. #CommonSense
- Maturity is everything. If you truly believe that catfishing women is what it takes to find a good girl, you've clearly been living under a rock. There's no need to have 12 accounts disguised as other local women and male celebrities with rock solid abs as a ploy to bait your victims. If you're still catfishing these days, that's a true sign you need to grow up.
At this point, I'm right here in the open. Unlike you, I'm not hiding and I'm encouraging you to defend your actions. Seriously, call me up! I'd love to chat with you LIVE on The Michael Rock Show - (508) 994-1071. If you truly believe that what you're doing is 100 percent appropriate, then I would love to hear it. And believe me, I'm positive that the just about the entire SouthCoast will agree with me.
I'm asking for you to stop once and for all and redeem yourself. You've already caused enough harm, and quite frankly, I'm tired of hearing from my friends and listeners that you've victimized another person or, even worse, them. They have told me unspeakable things that have made my blood boil, and unfortunately I can not repeat what you've done in this letter.
Be a man and quit while you can. Eventually, no one will fall for your trickery and I can promise you that I won't stop this argument until you stop catfishing.
Best of luck, Fall River catfish. This won't be the last you'll hear from me.
-- Gazelle (Your Local Neighborhood Spiderman)