These days, the amount of online cyberbullying is horrendous.

The internet as we know it is nothing but a giant dumpster fire that's nearly impossible to extinguish. Opinions are no longer opinions, but rather a judgmental thesis of someone's view on something. It's one thing to agree or disagree, but the words written and posted are nothing more than hateful accusations and disgust towards everyone else besides the author.

When it comes to being the victim of bullying, I know all too well of it.

Growing up, I wasn't exactly the person I became today. I lacked confidence, I was scrawny somedays, chubby the next. I never fit in and always sought out humor to counteract the hurt. Even right now, writing this brings back the pain I've buried for far too long.

About a month ago, I endured one of the scariest moments of my life that landed me in the hospital. Since then, I've become someone completely different. I've lost the will to exercise and lack any form of motivation. Yes, I've gained weight and I'm struggling with that on the daily. It's uneasy, to say the least, to think that this is my "new normal," the unofficial quote of 2020.

It's not as though I've given up on myself. My health is still very important to me; it's more of trying to harness the energy to progress. So when I see someone (whom I won't mention) that I don't even know make unsettling comments on my social media, name-calling just to put me down for their own pleasure, it makes it that much difficult.

To think that something so small as a keyboard warrior can bring such a hurtful impact is outrageous. I'm not the only one who has been affected by this and that's what saddens me the most.

We all see it, whether it's on TikTok or Facebook or even Instagram where the modern-day body image is shamed daily. Yes, I feel for those who have been beaten down by words that are meaningless yet cruel and malicious. What even is the point? The devil's advocate in me feels sympathy towards the attackers, including my own.

At the age of 32, you would think that something along the lines of bullying would be a thing of the past, yet here I am, upset and outraged.

There will never be an end to bullying, and that's the sad fact. Awareness can only go so far before someone else becomes swindled up into an abyss of negativity and absurd taunting. Nobody can truly know how far someone will go to hurt someone, and often won't stop until they've succeeded. That's the sad part.

So to all those who think this is simply a game to boost your self-image or confidence, enough is enough. Your tactics of bringing down those around you are temporary bruises that will one day blossom into strength and credence.

Finally, to my own personal bully, I know you're reading this, as you have read my past articles on food and living my best life, only to throw rocks at a glass house. Know that I feel sorry for you, for whatever is hurting you on the inside so much that you feel the need to lash out on the innocence of others.

From the bottom of my heart, I truly hope that you find your happiness, however that may be, wherever that may be.

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