You came out to dance and drink so, please, do that and just leave the DJ alone.

I haven't even been DJing a full year yet, and I'm already exhausted by the wild interactions with people. I get it, you want to hear what you want to hear. You paid to get in. You invested your own hard-earned money into having a good time tonight. Trust me, I get it.

Here's the thing though: you know that guy or girl up there in the booth, playing music? They're working. This is their job. They more than likely know what's going to get you dancing.

"But the DJ isn't playing anything I like!"

Well, Karen, do you really think hearing that one Drake song that's hot right now is going to change your overall experience? If the DJ is bad, he's going to be bad after you've done the full #InMyFeelingsChallenge, too.

"I don't like this kind of music!"

Well Tim, everyone else in this venue seems to be having a good time. Maybe you're just hanging with the wrong crowd, buddy. Or you're just a killjoy.

"Man I know just what this crowd will love."

No. No you don't, Kelly.

"Bro, let me plug my phone in and play this."

Listen frat boy Freddy, don't call me bro, and if you hand me this phone I'm immediately inserting it into your drink. I'm not just going to plug you in so you can try and brag to all the poor unsuspecting girls in here with fake IDs that you were "DJing."

"Well dude why can't you just play it again?"

Well Jessica, why can't you take less time styling that rat's nest on your head and get here earlier so you don't miss any songs? Do you march in the movies two hours in and ask for them to rewind it back so you can see the scene where Zac Efron was shirtless? No Jess, you don't, so please just go order another appletini and let me work.

Just think about how annoying it is when that idiot two cubicles down, who has no idea how to do your job, starts telling you exactly how to do your job. Now imagine them doing that same thing, but they're about 15 beers deep. I'm sure you'd fantasize about giving them a nice little Chuck Norris spin kick to the back of the head.

That's pretty much what it's like as a DJ when you keep requesting the wobble and the cupid shuffle.

Just try this. Sit back. Grab a drink. Enjoy your night. If you're there long enough and hear absolutely nothing you like from this DJ, then leave. Go somewhere different. Obviously this DJ isn't for you. That's ok.

Just please, for the love of God, respect the DJ and let him do his or her thing. They know what they're doing.

Thank you.




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