What Halloween Really Needs Is Adult-Style Trick-or-Treating
I don't know about you, but I'm feeling 22 and in need of some trick-or-treating.
However, since I don't have kids to go door to door asking for candy, it comes off as a little strange for an almost 32-year-old to set out to do so.
This is why I fully suggest a day where adults only, 21 plus, can leave their kids behind if they have any, or simply team up with friends and family and go door to door in their costumes without being labeled as a creep.
Of course, this would totally be a different day than Halloween and would always land on a Saturday to ensure that if in fact shots of vodka are being passed out, it's on a weekend instead of a weekday. There must be rules to this, though, as each person is only allowed a certain amount of alcoholic favors to reduce the chance of public intoxication (again, this is a fun event, not a sloppy one) and they must step at least one foot inside the host's house to indulge.
Putting adult beverages aside, tacos should be given out as well with the option of soft or hard shells for those who have a preference. All the fixings should be offered and for health concerns, the only people who can give these out are actual restaurants as they are already approved by the health board and have a reputation to uphold.
Finally, gift cards or gas cards can be passed out or hidden like an easter egg hunt for a Halloween-Easter fusion. It doesn't have to be much; personally, those "Free Frosty" coupons are clutch and even $1 or $5 to Chipotle is a helpful bargain.
I'm not sure how this would get passed as a national holiday or what bill I need to pass along to Congress, but anyone out there with a single "fun" bone in their body would agree that an annual "Adult Halloween" on a Saturday is a brilliant idea.