There Is an Obscene Amount of Poop Toys to Choose from This Christmas
When you have kids who are toilet-humor years old, your shopping list looks a bit strange.
What started as a poop-themed set of Play-Doh for my son's birthday turned into a rabbit hole of feces-themed games and toys online. These toys give a whole new meaning to the phrase "s--- list."
First, there's Shoot the Poop. The premise is pretty simple, like a gross twist on Ants-in-the Pants. The goal is to get all of your poops into Tank the Talking Toilet before the other players do (do). Ironically, you don't want to be No. 2 to win this one.
Next is Hasbro's Don't Step In It, a game about every dog owner's backyard. Obviously, the person who came up with this idea has kids, a dog, and now some hilarious backstory for how he came up with this brilliant idea and got Hasbro to buy into it. Don't worry, there is a Unicorn version of this game, too. Both versions will leave you with soft, squishy faux-poo in between your bare toes.
Flushin' Frenzy is just one of many toilet games on the market. However, it steps up its game by having fake poop (with eyes and human teeth, mind you) shoot out of the bowl and into the air when the toilet is plunged a certain amount of times. Tom Hyne's simple review of this game tells you all you need to know about its gift potential: "My grandson was enthralled, my wife appalled."
Next up is a bath toy (or possible pool toy), Fishing for Floaters. It's aptly named, as it comes with two fishing rods and lots of poop for you to hook. Goofy as it is, the game is actually designed to encourage patience and develop hand-eye coordination all while keeping your kids entertained at bathtime.
Mattel's Gas Out Game is a simple card game – a bit like Uno – with a gassy twist. Players get knocked out of the game when Guster the Gas Cloud relieves himself. Honestly, who even thinks of these things? It has a 4.5-star rating and in general; people think the game is "a gas."
Lastly, the Who Pooped? Memory & Matching Game. This isn't as grotesque as some of the other poop games out there and is perfect for the tiny wilderness explorer in your life. If your kids like finding animal tracks in the mud, they'd probably get a kick of a matching poop to its animal.
If you want to get something that doesn't have much of a shelf-life and leave you listening to fart noises and endless toilet flushing, the Play-Doh set is an easy enough gift. It will eventually dry up and disappear the way you hope all the poop toys do.