I’m Not A “Grooming” Kind Of Guy

It happened again last night. My wife got back from getting a facial and said, "You'd love this! Why don't you try it?" Come on, now.

I may have my quirks, but I'm certainly not a facial kind of guy. I'm not even 100% sure what a facial is, but I think it involves a face massage with creams that smell pretty. Now, why in the world would I want a pretty smelling face? Besides, my face is last on the list of places I'd want a massage (because it's not sore...why what were YOU thinking???)

Before we went on our cruise in June, she tried to talk me into getting a pedicure. "You'll be wearing flip flops," she said. "You want your feet to look good, right?" Actually, I don't care one bit if my feet look good. In fact, I'm a little suspicious of guys who DO have good looking feet. Their priorities are clearly questionable.

My wife has even suggested I get a manicure. "You meet a lot of people and shake a lot of hands," she reasoned. She reminded me that she was the one who kept telling me to get a massage so I could relax. I must admit, I was a skeptic of massages of any kind until I had my first one about a year ago. I got an incredible massage with bamboo sticks and hot rocks (sounds more like torture than a massage doesn't it?) It turned out to be incredible. I was so relaxed when I left the spa I almost felt drugged. Another massage? Maybe. But a manicure? I don't think so. And plucking? Forget it. I don't want anything on me to get plucked.

My wife says a lot of guys are getting manis, pedis and facials these days, but was completely stumped when I asked her to name one. She couldn't give me ONE name.

Grooming is for girls.