B Mo’s Monster Mash Rulebook

After I experienced my first Monster Mash last year, I think we should lay down some ground rules for this year.

1) No Creepy Clowns

First and foremost, I beg of you, please no creepy clowns. I'm genuinely and unreasonably terrified by them. Last year there was some girl who was dressed as Pennywise and it was arguably the worst moment of my life. I am nowhere near emotionally stable enough to handle that type of terror, so no crazy clowns allowed. Please and thank you.

2) Stop Standing Around and Dance

Did you come just to watch people have fun, or are you here to have fun too? Last year it took WAY too long for people to start getting their groove on. The music is bumpin' all night, so get out there and get your "Thriller" on.

3) Go All Out on Your Costume

First of all, there's a costume contest with a cash prize, so you should definitely be playing to win. Last year, there were some really impressive costumes, and I'm sure this year will be no different, so bring that A-Game.

4) Do Not, at Any Point, Ever Be Afraid to Buy Me a Drink

What can I say? I like to be treated like the diva I am (Just kidding, you don't have to) (But you can) (But you don't have to).

5) I'm Engaged, So Stealing Parts of My Costume Won't Score You a Date.

It sounds ridiculous, I know, but it happened last year. Someone decided to steal part of my costume and then held it hostage. "You'll get it back when I get a date." Nope. That's not how this works. That's not how any of this works. So please don't steal my stuff, or anyone's stuff for that matter.

That's all I have for this year. I'm sure after living all the amazing magnificent madness, I'll come up with some new ones for next year.

I better see you all there!