Ten Signs You Might Be Dating A Crazy Person
Crazy people are never, ever crazy to begin with. They are also almost always hot. After years of experiences always observing both the behavior of crazy people and listened to the advice of normal humans. Here are ten surefire signs to spot and avoid a crazy significant other:
1. They hate your friends and love your enemies
They hate your ‘girls or‘bros’ and makes it a point to socialize with all the morons you hate. They will avoid hanging out with you and your crew and it always goes quiet when they call when you’re out with them also when you narrate some awesome hangout anecdote and subtly drops hints that they think your friends suck. Conversely, they will enjoy the company of people you cannot stand.
2. They can dish it out, but can’t take it
Crazy people claim they have a great sense of humor, and some do – when it’s at the expense of somebody other than them. They will constantly berate and insult you in front of your friends under the guise of “oh come on, can’t you take a joke?”. Bringing up embarrassing times when you tried to be romantic, draw attention to your stress acne and make fun of your failures.
3. They have crazy and sudden mood swings
When a woman is pregnant, good luck. You need to shut up and be there for her, no matter how crazy she gets. Men understand this and give women that license. However, this courtesy does not extend to the non-pregnant crazy woman. Ladies, You know when a man is on roids. Roid rage is no fun and you wont want to deal with that.
4. They have a very scary laugh
Does their laugh make the pit of your stomach turn icy cold? A beautiful woman laughing is one of the best sounds any guy can hear. However, a crazy person laughing might be the most terrifying sound to reach your ears. The way to certify this is to look at their eyes: you can see the emptiness, blackness and terror. On the other hand, Is it joy? Or a prelude to torture?
5. When they ‘playfully’ hit you, she leaves bruises
It’s awfully cute being playful with someone your dating and they may playfully punch you in the shoulder when you’re teasing them or gently smack you on your thigh when you crack an inappropriate joke. It’s a sign of affection. However, crazy people will beat you like Chris Brown. They will never hit you if they’re feeling genuine affection for you. However, if you tease them, or crack a joke that mildly offends them, they will beat you like they caught you breaking into their house.
6. They hate your mom
Most people have a decent relationship with their mother. However crazy people do not like this what so ever. They consider her the root of all your prejudices and complexes about “liberated people” or “free thinking”.
7. They hate their mom
Crazy people do not have good relationships with their mothers. Their worst fear is that they will turn out exactly like them. Most of the time, they are already have. For example, If you are dating a crazy girl who constantly fights with her mother, complains about how her mother doesn’t understand her or has her mom saved on her phone as the womb, you need to start running as fast as your legs can take you.
8. They will find a way to be the victim
Did they forget your birthday and you find yourself apologizing? Did they yell at you in front of all your friends, yet then find yourself groveling? Did they flirt with some other person at a party yet you’re the one begging for forgiveness? Crazy people will always find a way to make you feel like the fascist, misogynistic part of the relationship. If they do anything to upset you, it’s because of your inability to handle a ‘strong independent human bring’
9. They will take over your Facebook page
You know how most animals pee in a large circle to mark their territory? A crazy person will do the same thing to your Facebook page. The flood of inane comments that will start off fairly innocuously with cutesy, humorous little quips followed by smileys or their immoral cousins winky smileys. Watch out!
10. Their ex is visibly relieved to not be dating them
Usually it’s always a tense situation when you meet the ex. You start sizing them up, wondering what they liked about them and whether there is still feelings there. Here is something I pay attention to, if you mention their name and the expression they have glazes over like a Vietnam flashback – you need to be worried. Overly enthusiastic about meeting you? Run.
The inspiration for this story came from Huffington Post: 11 Signs You May Be Dating a Sociopath.