Look at this face.  Does this look like the face of a kid that would get a kindergarten report card like this?  This is FAKE NEWS.  VERY FAKE NEWS.

My mother dug up my kindergarten report card.  Honestly, it wasn't the best.  Apparently, I may have had some problems with "self control".  But the "Needs Improvements" in nearly every category pale in comparison to the teacher's note that was sent home.  My wife saw this note, and got a pit in her stomach thinking it was one of OUR kids.  Nope.  This was 5 year old me.  There is NO WAY my teacher's account of this is true.  This is a prime example of FAKE NEWS.

Although she CLAIMS I was a bad boy...my mother will tell you that I was a VERY good boy!!!  These lies were very hurtful, and I believe I am owed an apology.

I ask you again.  How could that little face do anything wrong inside a classroom?