Remember how Rob Kardashian stole a female photographer's memory card and probably hit her? It's all her fault because nothing is ever Rob Kardashian's fault, you big bullies.

Kardashian is telling his friends (he has those?) that he stole the camera gear because the pap followed him onto private property and dared to snap photos of him changing clothes.

Have you seen him lately? We wouldn't want those getting out either.

Kardashian told his pals that he was changing clothes in the gym's garage, because apparently a private, ritzy establishment like Gunnar Peterson's wouldn't have anything as lowly as a locker room that was up to RK's standards.

The garage is caged off to the public and members have to enter a passcode to enter, so Kardashian isn't sure how the photog got in. Sources told TMZ that most paparazzi wait on public property to get their shots of celebs leaving the gym.

However, a witness told TMZ that this particular snapper actually parked her own car in the garage and snapped shots in there.

That's no defense for robbery, but if the victim is less than sympathetic, prosecutors may decline to press charges -- because a jury may not convict Kardashian for his actions if they feel they were justified, even if they were illegal.

Either that or everyone will just blame Rita Ora again. After all, don't forget -- she's why he gained weight in the first place, remember?

That is, unless the box had access to 'Keeping Up With the Kardashians' or the Internet, in which case this battle of Jerk v. Jerk may well end up in a hung jury.