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Marriage Limits

Getty Images/Douglas Grundy 

I had an interesting conversation with my husband over the weekend, where I was pretty surprised with what he had to say.

I was telling him a story about a woman that had 20 cats, and I asked him “What would you do if we had 20 cats?”  He said we would never have 20 cats, he wouldn’t allow it.  So I said, well, what’s the limit?  He responded saying, if we had 10 cats, he wouldn’t be able to handle it and would leave.  LEAVE!!!  What?!

We currently have four cats.  That means I’m six cats away from him leaving me!  I’m not saying I want 10 cats, I don’t, but I feel bad for stray cats in the neighborhood and just want to help them out!  It’s possible that I could bring in another cat…or a few…I don’t know!  I just have a big heart for animals.  I feel really uneasy that he said his limit with me was 10.  Isn’t marriage a forever thing?  Jeez, I thought it was.

So, I took the conversation a little further, wondering if there were possibly some other things that were “deal breakers”.  I asked what would happen if I racked up a ton of debt, he said he wouldn’t leave.  I asked if he would leave if I gained 200 lbs., he said nope, he’d stay.  Or what about getting thousands of dollars worth of plastic surgery?  He said he would be mad if I did that, but again, wouldn’t leave.  Well, that’s refreshing I guess.

I’m just surprised…out of all things, besides cheating, because for us, that’s a deal-breaker on both sides…I just never thought he’d say he’d leave over a certain number of cats.  I really don’t know what to think…maybe I should just say hey, it doesn’t matter, we’re never going to have 10 cats anyway…or I should really think about how seriously he has taken his vows?  Marriage is supposed to be ’til death do us part….

Is there any deal-breakers for you in your relationship?  Not counting cheating, I think that’s an obvious deal-breaker, not always for everyone, but usually.  Anything that your partner or spouse could do that would just make you walk away?


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