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Comforting Or Creepy?

baby feet
Vernon Wiley

As one who is not a parent yet, I may not have the perfect perspective on this. But I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have handled this quite the way one mother did.

Losing a child is nothing but heartbreaking for the parents and I imagine dealing with this loss is the most difficult thing a parent would ever have to face. But when there are other children involved it can perhaps be even more difficult to help them figure out how to deal with that loss.

But for one mother, the decision on how to help her three-year-old son mourn the loss of his baby brother after just five days has gotten a lot of attention.

As People magazine reported, Ashlee Hammac heartbreakingly lost her newborn son Ryan after five days due to Hypoxic-Ischemic Encephlopathy, or HIE, a brain dysfunction that happens when there is a lack of blood flow to the brain.

Now I don’t have children myself, so I can’t come close to putting myself in Ashlee’s shoes, but her recent decision on how to pay tribute to her young son honestly has me scratching my head.

boy in sandbox

With a three-year-old at home already Ashlee says her oldest son Tucker always goes out to Ryan’s grave site with her, singing his baby brother lullabies and talking to him like he was there. So when she was thinking of a way to decorate Ryan’s grave and pay tribute to her lost child, she came up with an interesting concept to say the least.

Ashlee has turned her five-day-old son’s grave into a sandbox that her three-year-old Tucker now plays in when they go visit the site. Tucker brings his trucks and just plays as you can see in pictures Ashlee has shared on Facebook.

Tucker playing at grave site pictures

I definitely empathize with Ashlee and can’t begin to relate to the pain she must have felt at losing her newborn son.

But I’m just not sure how I feel about her sandbox idea and what affect that may have on the older son. I know I’m not a parent, but there are many of you out there, so how do you feel about her tribute?


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